haha I went shopping today. Hence the title. I went to Sally's [I WORSHIP Sally's. Awesome products at amazing prices. GO THERE] and got some good hair color. I'm going to do blonde on top and brown on the bottom, with maybe some blonde streaks on the bottom like in front. Anywho, enough about my amazingly awesome hair.
I've started using my twitter more. Follow me : http://twitter.com/kenzienicole93. I've also just now created a flickr. http://www.flickr.com/people/40009138@N06/ I haven't uploaded anything yet, but I'll be working on it. I also have a youtube : http://www.youtube.com/user/kenzienicole93 haha I love the originality in my url name choices :/
But yeah, I'll be working on those. I'd love to keep everyone updated and such. And tell me if you have anything you want me to focus on in my videos, or even my photography.
<3
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Friday, June 26, 2009
home.
I hate this town.
I hate Maine.
I want to go back to Japan. I was so happy there.
I was bawling in the bathroom when we went out to dinner tonight. I just want to go back. That's my home. Everyone's leaving me here. My "real" friends aren't around anymore. They don't talk to me. I've done nothing.
dfpoaisd sorry
I haven't been on my medicine for a while.
So I kind of break down about nothing.
I just want my old life back.
I hate Maine.
I want to go back to Japan. I was so happy there.
I was bawling in the bathroom when we went out to dinner tonight. I just want to go back. That's my home. Everyone's leaving me here. My "real" friends aren't around anymore. They don't talk to me. I've done nothing.
dfpoaisd sorry
I haven't been on my medicine for a while.
So I kind of break down about nothing.
I just want my old life back.
Friday, June 19, 2009
my drunken journal entry.
Wow...it's been sooo long since I last blogged. But yeah, I promise I'll get back into it since I have my laptop back and it's summer so I'm not that busy..at the moment.
Soooooo last night.
Drank a bit.
vented quite a bit.
wrote in muh journal
it's barely legible because I was pretty gone like... yeah
but here it is:
I'm kind of drunk. Quite tipsy. I have Ryan's school picture card thing next to me. I miss him so much. He was my everything. He is the reason I'm like this. He is the reason I'm in therapy and he's why I drink and smoke and get high. He made me feel so good, and now that he's gone I feel shitty. Even though it's been months since we broke up, he is still everything I think about and I can't sleep without him haunting my dreams. I just want to feel that warmth again. I just want to fee[l] his kiss again. I miss his friendship I miss talking on the phone with him. I miss him. So much. I miss my friend. I miss my companion. I don't know why I wasn't good enough for him. Lord knows I tried my best. I just wanted to make him happy with me. I know he's been hurt but I would never have hurt him. I loved/love him too much to ever cause him pain. I would take him back in an instant. I miss him. I'd rather die than be with anyone else [woahhh mellowdramatic...]. Why does Libby [sorry Libby, I do like you] get all these chances that I never did? Why wasn't I good enough? Why weren't you happy? I'm so sorry I let you down. You must have expected more from me. And I wasn't good enough for you. I can't sleep without seeing you. I've never been so heartbroken in my entire life. I wish we could at least be friends. I wish you cared about me even just the littlest bit. I wish you hadn't made me so suicidal [it's not all his fault]. I wish you had been there. I wish you could have come to the doctor's with me. I needed your hand to hold. I needed your shoulder to cry on. I needed those phone conversations that could last for hours. I just needed you. But you weren't there for me cause you don't care about me. You never have and you never will. Good night my love.
.....yeah.
dumb.
Soooooo last night.
Drank a bit.
vented quite a bit.
wrote in muh journal
it's barely legible because I was pretty gone like... yeah
but here it is:
I'm kind of drunk. Quite tipsy. I have Ryan's school picture card thing next to me. I miss him so much. He was my everything. He is the reason I'm like this. He is the reason I'm in therapy and he's why I drink and smoke and get high. He made me feel so good, and now that he's gone I feel shitty. Even though it's been months since we broke up, he is still everything I think about and I can't sleep without him haunting my dreams. I just want to feel that warmth again. I just want to fee[l] his kiss again. I miss his friendship I miss talking on the phone with him. I miss him. So much. I miss my friend. I miss my companion. I don't know why I wasn't good enough for him. Lord knows I tried my best. I just wanted to make him happy with me. I know he's been hurt but I would never have hurt him. I loved/love him too much to ever cause him pain. I would take him back in an instant. I miss him. I'd rather die than be with anyone else [woahhh mellowdramatic...]. Why does Libby [sorry Libby, I do like you] get all these chances that I never did? Why wasn't I good enough? Why weren't you happy? I'm so sorry I let you down. You must have expected more from me. And I wasn't good enough for you. I can't sleep without seeing you. I've never been so heartbroken in my entire life. I wish we could at least be friends. I wish you cared about me even just the littlest bit. I wish you hadn't made me so suicidal [it's not all his fault]. I wish you had been there. I wish you could have come to the doctor's with me. I needed your hand to hold. I needed your shoulder to cry on. I needed those phone conversations that could last for hours. I just needed you. But you weren't there for me cause you don't care about me. You never have and you never will. Good night my love.
.....yeah.
dumb.
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